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“I was bringing a toaster oven. Now I’ll have to send a juicer instead.”
— Ray Starman
Too late now, Ray, but we should have pooled our money to get the Bezos a heart-shaped waffle maker.
The wedding was quite extravagant, with lavish gifts being exchanged. I was quite nervous about discreetly including the toaster oven among the presents on the stage. However, my anxiety eased when I noticed Sydney Sweeney gifting a gallon of her used bathwater.
We’re back, and so is 55-year-old Kami Rita Sherpa, who has climbed Mount Everest 31 times. Still no Starbucks up there.
And the Yanks are back. The Blankees put a “12” on the board on Sunday. Carlos Rodón throws at Toronto. Rodón shut out Cincinnati in his most recent start.
Learn all you need to know about MLB Betting
The Jays’ Max Scherzer returned to the rotation (right thumb) and gave up three runs to Cleveland. Play $50 on the Yankees.
They’re Grrreat! Tigers pinned the Twins 3-0. Tarik Skubal tossed a one-hitter for seven innings and fanned 13 Twinkies. Winner!
Down -264 dennymclains.
Why Trust New York Post Betting
The one and only Stitches has been handicapping baseball, daily, for the Post since 2019. Miraculously, he has finished in the black twice. But wait there’s more. He showed his versatility by winning the Post’s NFL Best Bet crown last year.