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A recent study by Bright Horizons reveals that 55% of parents use screen time as a bargaining chip, offering it as a reward or withholding it as punishment to manage their children’s behavior. Is this trend helping or disturbing the force of the parenting tool box?

Kids watching tablet and phone. FREEPIK.COM

According to Parents.com, the study found that 55% of parents use technology as a bargaining chip to get their children to do things like chores or homework. Fifty-eight percent of parents use technology as a parenting tool to keep their children quiet while shopping, in a restaurant, etc.

“Digital rewards for tasks may prevent children from learning internal coping strategies and cause reward expectations for every action,” Sanam Hafeez PsyD, New York City-based neuropsychologist director of Comprehend the Mind, explained to the outlet. “Extended exposure to screens as a reward system may eventually impair their capacity to wait for rewards, handle frustration, and enjoy activities that don’t involve screens.”

Dr. Hafeez added, “Digital devices become essential to their emotional well-being as children develop dependencies for comfort and validation through screen time. The regular use of screens as behavioral management tools may disrupt children’s development of patience and their ability to tolerate boredom, while also undermining their acquisition of healthy coping mechanisms.”

Young boy with cell phone. FREEPIK.COM

Helen Egger, MD, co-founder and chief scientific and medical officer of Little Otter, echoed Dr. Hafeez’s sentiments, adding, “When screen time becomes the go-to strategy for navigating every challenge—the primary bargaining chip, the constant distraction, the expected reward—that’s when we start to see potential impacts on a child’s emotional growth.”

“If screens are consistently used to bypass those feelings—to distract from sadness, to reward good behavior instead of intrinsic satisfaction—they might miss out on developing those crucial internal coping mechanisms. They might also learn that screens are the primary source of pleasure or the only way to avoid discomfort.”

Child reading on an iPad. ADOBE STOCK IMAGES

Can parents properly utilize screen time in the realm of parenting/child negotiations?

Well, according to according to Dr. Hafeez, parents can successfully use screen time as a bargaining tool or reward dependent upon how regular you use the “tool” and how it is implemented. 

“Screens serve as effective motivators since allowing children screen time after they finish homework or chores encourages them to develop self-discipline and learn structured routines,” she told Parents. “Screens can serve as a practical method to soothe children during stressful situations, such as long car rides or waiting room stays, when used moderately.”

Basically, the bottom line goes back to that old saying, everything in moderation. 

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