Megachurch pastor John Gray recently issued a heartfelt public apology to his wife Aventer and his numerous followers following a turbulent period involving inappropriate relationships and a sexting scandal that severely tested his marriage and ministry.

During a podcast episode of ‘Dear Future Wifey,’ hosted by Laterras R. Whitfield and recorded at Gray’s Love Story Church in Greenville, South Carolina (previously known as Relentless Church), the 50-year-old pastor confronted the issue head-on.

Gray candidly attributed his behavior to childhood sexual trauma and what he described as the influence of ‘demonic forces,’ revealing that he had been a victim of sexual assault at the tender age of four.

‘I want to say to Aventer, I want to thank you for showing me what the love of Christ looks like because you loved a very unlovable man,’ Gray said during the nearly three-hour podcast. ‘And I want to tell you how very sorry I am for the pain I caused,

‘I’ve never said this, but to the people who knew that God called me but saw the headlines of a failure and a failing and a brokenness that you didn’t know the origin of, for the people who were deeply disappointed, I want to say I’m sorry,’ he added.

Gray claimed his ‘dysfunctional approach to marriage’ stemmed from childhood sexual trauma involving multiple men.

‘I was thrown away. I was spit on. I was maligned for the brokenness that was given to me on a grassy front yard at four years old when two men took my innocence,’ he admitted.

Gray also claimed this traumatic experience introduced ‘a demon’ that ‘sat dormant for years.’

Megachurch pastor John Gray has made an emotional public apology to his wife Aventer and thousands of followers after inappropriate relationships and a sexting scandal nearly destroyed his marriage and ministry

The controversial church leader, 50, opened up during a recent episode of Laterras R. Whitfield’s podcast ‘Dear Future Wifey,’ recorded at Gray’s Love Story Church (formerly Relentless Church) in Greenville, South Carolina

‘And that demon that entered me when they took my innocence sat dormant for years, waiting for me to get married to show up so I could fail,’ he said.

‘And I’ve been in church my whole life. And everybody told me Jesus would fix it. Jesus would fix it. But there are some things the altar can’t do.’

Gray claimed that he remained a virgin until marrying Aventer at age 37, though he admitted to ‘near sexual experiences’ including phone sex and masturbation before.

He also spoke about his upbringing with his single mother.

He described growing up as an only child with a Christian mother who responded to his first wet dream by telling him to ‘take a bath, ask the Lord to forgive you and go back to sleep.’

‘I had a wet dream, and I ran into my mother’s room crying because I didn’t know what had happened. And she said, ‘This is called a nocturnal emission.’… She said, ‘Go take a bath. Ask the Lord to forgive you and go back to sleep.”

‘I’m not angry at my mother. She is only who she is because that’s what she was raised and taught. But what that tells me is that I didn’t do a bad thing. I am bad.’

‘So now I’m sexually repressed. That’s a teenager. We still haven’t unpacked the fact that I was spitting urine out of my mouth at 4 years old on a front lawn,’ Gray said.

‘And so a demon was introduced in [that] moment. And I don’t care what you believe; demons are assigned to families because some of you all have generations of people who have failed at the same thing, and then it comes to knock on your door.’

Gray claimed his ‘dysfunctional approach to marriage’ stemmed from childhood sexual trauma involving multiple men

Gray claimed that he remained a virgin until marrying Aventer at age 37, though he admitted to ‘near sexual experiences’ including phone sex and masturbation before

‘And I don’t know what your door is or what your demon is, but before you go sending me to Hell, you should probably check for the demons that’s knocking on your door.’

Gray also surprisingly claimed that he wasn’t trying to hide his inappropriate relationships but actually ‘wanted it to happen’ so his ministry would end.

‘I was not blindsided by people going to blogs. I wanted it to happen because I was trying to die, and I was trying to be exed out, and I wanted her [Aventer] to leave because I never felt worthy of her,’ Gray said, sharing that he constantly envisioned himself alone in a two-bedroom apartment with a brown table stacked with unpaid bills.

‘Yep. No wife, no kids. And that’s how I thought my life would be for years. So the fact that she was there, she’s accomplished, she’s learned, and she loves the part of me that I hate; I didn’t trust her because how can you love me and I don’t love me.’