Davina McCall made a heartbreaking admission as she opened up about the weeks leading up to her brain surgery. In November 2024, the presenter underwent a craniotomy after doctors discovered a “very rare” colloid cyst in her brain. The 57-year-old remained in intensive care for three days after the gruelling five-hour surgery, which was a success. Before having the operation, Davina forced herself to come to terms with the fact she may not survive, noting how several of her family members died young.

In a new interview with Good Housekeeping UK, she said: “I’ve been terrified of dying my whole life. My mum died quite young, my dad died quite young, and my sister died very young. I thought, ‘I have to come to terms with the fact that I might not make it, so what do I have to do to make that okay?’ I had to let go of the outcome and be able to go to sleep without the abject horror of the idea of dying.”

Davina continued: “I said to Michael, ‘If I go, I really need you to keep plugged in to the kids and stay in their lives.’ We were both scared, but we were honest and told each other that. It made the whole thing less daunting, knowing that everything was out on the table.”

The former Big Brother host shares Holly, 23, Tilly, 21, and Chester, 18, with her ex-husband Matthew Robertson. Davina found love again with hairdresser Michael Douglas, who she credits for supporting her throughout the terrifying ordeal. 

After having surgery, Davina experienced short-term memory loss, but said it slowly returned over the following months. 

Asked about her partner’s reaction to her memory loss, Davina said: “Michael’s been mega helpful with me on all of this. It’s exhausting looking after someone so vulnerable and needy.

“At one point I thought his behaviour was a bit odd, but I couldn’t remember why it felt odd! I said to him, ‘Michael, I’ve noticed you don’t want to be around me much.

“If you feel differently about me, it’s fine, I understand.’ He said, ‘It’s because you’re annoying at the moment,’ and I’ve never been so relieved to be told that I’m annoying. I knew I was, because I’d repeat the same questions over and over again. We both laughed hard at that.”

Despite being told the tumour was benign, the Long Lost Family host was convinced death was imminent and proceeded to make an end-of-life checklist.

Speaking at Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place Festival, Davina said: “I had to make sure that my kids were going to be OK if I did not make it. That is all I really cared about. I knew my partner, Michael, would be OK as he is a whole person, but I was really worried about my kids.”

Davina revealed that in the end, her checklist came down to finding peace in the fact that her loved ones would survive without her.

The full interview can be read now in the October issue of Good Housekeeping UK.