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Zooming around town in your yoga pants, sipping on flat whites, and texting with plenty of emojis might make you feel vibrant and carefree.
However, according to brand and pop culture expert Rebecca May, these habits are among 27 lifestyle choices that signal you’re aging, at least in the eyes of the younger crowd.
If you believe serving burrata at your dinner party is the peak of culinary sophistication, you might be out of touch; stracciatella is now the trending soft cheese, and truffle-flavored crisps have also lost their allure.
Additional signs include reading Harry Potter outside of a children’s bedtime story, or using ‘Netflix and chill’ without irony.
Fashion choices are also telling, such as sporting a Uniqlo bum bag, invisible socks, or opting for a blazer and jeans as your go-to smart casual look.
And those who pride themselves on being organised come in for a stinging rebuke, because – according to Rebecca – there’s nothing that dates you faster than insisting on printing out your boarding pass or planning your route for every car journey in advance.
Read on, and weep, as Rebecca reveals the 27 signs that you’re officially getting old.
The tell-tale signs that are aging you…
There’s some things in life that mark out your age more than anything else – from ordering flat whites to still printing out your boarding passes rather than keeping them on your phone (stock photo)
1. You plan your route for a car journey even when you know where you are going just because
2. Truffle flavoured crisps should be left in the past, they’re that commonplace
3. Burrata is no longer cool. Not when you can get it down your local Tesco. Stracciatella is now being served at dinner parties for those in the know
4. You wear yoga pants all day… it’s not that stylish
5. You’re an adult and still love Harry Potter – and not just because of your children’s bedtime story routine
6. You reply in only emojis… especially the laughing face one
7. Your phone case opens like a book
8. You order a flat white but it’s no longer très chic
9. Your underwear is exclusively from M&S
10. You wear ankle socks. Socks aren’t embarrassing anymore, they’re meant to be seen
11. You add salt to your food before tasting it. That’s never the done thing anymore in polite circles
12. You’re obsessed with the Uniqlo bum bag, even though it’s no longer in vogue
13. Vinyls. It’s OK to simply be Team Spotify or Team Apple Music
14. You keep printed boarding passes ‘just in case’ – time-stamping yourself at the gate
15. You say ‘let’s do drinks’ but mean one glass and home by 9
16. You get genuinely excited about a new cleaning product – yes, we’ve all heard of The Pink Stuff
17. You say ‘the youth of today’ and mean it
18. You still think a ‘nice bottle of red’ makes you sophisticated
19. You screenshot everything instead of using the save feature on your phone
20. Having your child as your profile picture. No need to be that proud
21. Using two or three-in-one hair products. We’ve upped our hair care game
22. You still say ‘Netflix and chill’ unironically
23. You carry a reusable shopping bag ‘just in case’. Worse, you use it as your handbag
24. You still think ‘smart-casual’ means jeans and a blazer
25. You still match your shoes to your handbag
26. You still buy the same perfume you wore in university
27. You think ordering tap water at a restaurant requires an apology