Adiel Boyd: A kind and loving young girl, always remembered at 12 years old

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Warning: this story discusses suicide and mental health. If you or anyone you know is affected there are help-seeking numbers and websites at the end of the article.

The story includes images of a young First Nations person who has died, they are published with the family’s permission.

Adiel Boyd was a bright, intelligent and talented 12-year-old Torres Strait Islander girl with a loving, gentle spirit.

Tragically, Adiel took her own life at the end of last year, a few days after Christmas.

Adiel’s family, including her mother Vicky, siblings Jahmon, Tameka and Jodeci, Aunties, Uncles, nieces and nephews, are still trying to come to terms with her death, and that they are thankful to their extended family and community for their love and support.

“No family should be dealing with such tragedies,” they said in a statement to NITV.

“No parent should be burying their child, especially at such a young age.

“The spirit of suicide is taking our children away and society must work harder, as one, to conquer this disease.”

Adiel was an A+ student who was artistic and creative.

“Adiel was precious,” her family said.

“Her drawings were detailed and intricate.

“She loved learning to speak different languages … an A-grade student in German and Japanese, and was teaching herself Spanish, Tagalog from the Phillipines and Yumplatok, which is Torres Strait Creole.

“She taught herself how to play the guitar and piano and learned how to play the violin at school – that’s what she used the internet for, to learn new skills, new languages and for her studies.”

Adiel and Vicky Boyd. Vicky is a single mum who is always there for her children and grandchildren. Credit: Supplied by family

In her very short life, God gave us a glimpse of the amazing person Adiel would have grown into here on earth. Her beautiful soul continues to live on in Heaven.

Her family believes Adiel was targeted by friends online.

“Adiel loved her friends dearly and treasured their relationships,” they said.

“So, by feeling rejected and attacked in this space was something Adiel could not comprehend.

“She hated violence and conflict and tried to internalise everything, with no idea on how to process her emotional trauma in her 12-year-old mind and big heart.”

Her mum and siblings did their best to help Adiel deal with the hurt she was experiencing.

“Adiel’s tragedy was an unexpected shock to Vicky and the family, as they thought they were on top of it and did everything they could in their power to support and protect Adiel,” her family said.

“They had open conversations with Adiel, parental control on her phone and spoke to Adiel about the rules of owning a phone and when online.

“They checked-in every day with her and checked her messages.”

The only social media platform Adiel had access to was Snapchat, where her conversations were monitored by her older sister Tameka.

When her family became worried about what was being said on Snapchat, they reported it to the school.

They said in Torres Strait Islander culture, it takes a village to raise a child, with extensive kinship systems, roles and responsibilities of Aunties, Uncles, grandparents, and older cousins.

“Today’s society and the impact of colonisation and its westernised systems have wounded our practices and dispersed our people nationally, away from each other and away from our daily customs,” the family said.

“We hope that schools adopt our principles, that it takes a village to raise our children.”

Adiel’s family is calling on schools to become stronger advocates and more active in creating safe spaces for victims of bullying and more diligent in the treatment of perpetrators, saying counselling is needed for both and that teachers and other staff need appropriate training on how to approach the matter safely, sensitively, and immediately.

“The causes of their behaviour are deeply rooted either through trauma or learned behaviour and should be approached appropriately,” they said.

“Policies and procedures on paper must be more than a tick-the-box, they need to jump off the pages and be active in the school grounds.

“School children should also be more informed and taught how they can play a role in being a part of the solution by recognising and acknowledging bullying when it is happening amongst their peers, speaking out against it, and reporting it to school authorities …

“School children must be educated in this space because they have eyes where the teachers don’t.”

Adiel’s family says everyone has a role in creating a safer society and combating cyberbullying and bullying.

“Life coping strategies must be taught in schools where the danger lurks,” they said.

“Parents must actively create more of an awareness and educate their children on suicide prevention, cybersecurity, and actions to take against bullying.

“We need to make our children feel safe, supported, and loved, and to be aware of professional support systems out there that can help them, and their families deal with navigating their way through these dark times.”

Adiel’s family says all children are precious and future leaders, future parents.

“It is important to think about who we are raising as the next generations; what intergenerational trauma are we passing on?” they said.

“What poisons are perpetrators and predators passing on if society does not fix the system and learn how to deal with these issues effectively?

“We are tired. Tired of the struggles. Tired of the hate. Tired of the violence and toxic behaviours …

“We need more goodness and love in this world.”

To add to Adiel’s family’s trauma and grief, they say people have been making uninformed accusations and offensive comments towards them online.

“We ask you to STOP! Just STOP!” they said in their statement.

“Think about what you are doing – you have become cyberbullies yourselves, rubbing salt in our wounds by adding your contribution to the very thing you are speaking out against.

“If you have an ounce of goodness and compassion in your heart, that’s what our family needs, if you don’t have anything nice to say, keep scrolling.

“Adiel was loved. She was told every day, ‘I love you’ by her family.”

If you or anyone you know has been affected by this story, please consider asking for help.

Youth

Kids helpline 1800 551 800 or

headspace 1800 650 890 or

Lifeline 13 11 14 or text 0477 13 11 14 or lifeline.org.au

Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander service available 24/7

13 YARN

13 92 76 or 13yarn.org.au

Suicide Call Back Service

1300 659 467 or suicidecallbackservice.org.au