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I had completed a journalism degree in Manila and was working as a high school teacher. But the previous few years had been hard.
Lee describes her younger self as “rather conservative” and driven by family values. Source: Supplied
The Philippines was in political turmoil, which spurred the beginning of the massive exodus of Filipinos seeking work opportunities and greater freedoms abroad.
I was soul-searching and I was curious. So I decided to respond to the ad.
But nearing my 30s and knowing I wanted to be a mother someday, I decided to put myself out there to meet the man I wanted to spend my life with.
A decision to start a new life
Lee made the difficult decision to leave her family in the Philippines for the man in Australia she had decided to marry. Source: Supplied
I’d never thought I’d be in a relationship outside of my home culture and was worried about the challenges and judgement that came with it.
He was also honest. He was a divorcee and he was happy to provide for me.
So I made the bittersweet decision to leave my loved ones and my life in the Philippines to be with him.
Facing stigma in Australia
I had no idea who or what they were talking about. I’d never considered marrying for my own benefit. I wanted love, loyalty and commitment.
Being a new mother in a new country was tough. I was determined to make it my new home, but I had no support network here, so I had to rely on my husband emotionally and financially.
But my ongoing lack of family, friends and support plus the direct and casual racism I suffered all heavily impacted my mental health.
Lee (centre) says she is grateful for the opportunities her children have had in Australia that she “could only have dreamed of” in the Philippines. Source: Supplied
No regrets
For all of that, I’m glad I answered that ad for a pen pal.