A year and a half into living with the pain, she could have been sent back to jail today.

But instead she won her appeal and was allowed to go back home to Mandurah where she raised her two little girls. 

“A weight lifted, I could breathe, and in my mind it was more thanking my girls, because I know they’re watching over me somehow,” she told 9News exclusively.

The 32-year-old was initially jailed for eight months for careless driving causing death and ordered to serve two months immediately in March, then released two days later on bail, pending an appeal arguing her sentence was “manifestly excessive”.

“I was not prepared for that at all, very numbing, very crushing,” the mother said.

The crash in February last year claimed the life of her seven-year old twin daughters, Riley and Macey.

“They were my best friends, they weren’t just my daughters, they were everything,” she said.

The mother closed her eyes “momentarily”, losing control and hitting a tree off the Great Eastern Highway near Carrabin, about halfway between Perth and Kalgoorlie.

Police ruled out fatigue and distraction. 

“It was still me who closed her eyes for a second or two and not being able to correct, and the tree being there within a moment,” she said.

“It’s something I have to live with and that’s something I have flashbacks with every day.”

Her two girls were flung from the vehicle and didn’t survive.

“Both of them were so creative and artistic and thats been a part of my healing is doing arts and crafts,” Van Oyen said.

After she’s had time to rest, recover and honour her girls, Van Oyen wants to help other parents deal with their grief.

But for now, she just wants to grieve her girls.

“I’m struggling, I’m still learning how to deal with anxiety and the PTSD, but I will get there,” she said.

“I know not to ignore it now.”