According to John Lennon’s first wife, Paul McCartney was one of the few people Lennon trusted. McCartney knew his bandmate well, even though their relationship hit a rough patch in the 1970s. He revealed one of Lennon’s biggest insecurities and shared how he tried to console his friend about it.

Paul McCartney said John Lennon had many insecurities

McCartney and Lennon both grew up in Liverpool. While Lennon was more middle class than the rest of the Beatles, McCartney has said that his childhood was not as happy.

“I knew his father had left John and his mother when John was three, and I knew that was a huge pain for John growing up,” McCartney told Howard Stern. “And John went to live with his uncle and auntie, and then the uncle died. So John confided in me, he said, ‘You know, I think I could be a jinx against the male line.’”

McCartney said he had to remind his bandmate that none of this was his fault.

“I had to sort of talk him down off the edge,” he said. “I said ‘No you’re not. That’s stupid. It wasn’t your fault your bloody father left, John.’”

He believed Lennon’s childhood contributed to the angst he expressed as an adult.

“John did not have a great life in that department, in the family department, so even after his dad left at three, his mother got killed in front of the house he’s now staying in. And then, all those years later, his dad now shows up and wants money. And I think that led to a lot of John’s angst.”

Paul McCartney said he realized John Lennon wrote a song about his insecurities

McCartney said Lennon’s insecurities came through clearly in a song like “Help!”

“When he and I were together, there wasn’t a lot of that because we were just friends and we were doing stuff and we were being creative,” McCartney said. “I mean a song like ‘Help,’ I remember sitting down and writing this with John and he’d come  up with the ‘When I was younger, so much younger…’ And I suddenly realized, ‘Okay, well we’re talking about an insecurity thing, but this is great. It’s a song.’”

McCartney thought the song was great. He realized later that it was Lennon’s way of expressing his turbulent emotions.

“Once we finished, we were very happy with it,” McCartney said. “It was only later when I thought, ‘Wow, you know what? That was a real cry for help. He really meant it.’”

Lennon has also expressed that the song was a genuine cry for help.

He said his upbringing made the ‘Help’ singer guarded

McCartney said Lennon’s upbringing and insecurities made him put up a protective shield around himself. 

“John’s persona was very guarded, hopelessly guarded,” McCartney said on the iHeartPodcast McCartney: A Life in Lyrics (via NME). “That’s where all his wit came from. Like so many comedians, it’s to shield themselves against the world.”

While this could make his personality caustic, McCartney said he liked this side of his bandmate.

“John having a very difficult upbringing – his father leaves home, his uncle dies and his mother gets killed – he could be very sarcastic,” McCartney said. “We all could, it was my way of dealing with my mother’s death. There would often be a very witty put-down. It wouldn’t always be a put-down but it was always a very quick answer, and he’d trained himself to do that. That was one of the attractive things about him.”