Rachel Stevens has opened up about the ongoing emotional journey she’s experiencing, years after ending her marriage to property tycoon Alex Bourne.

The former S Club Seven singer, now 47, shared a five-year marriage with Alex, with whom she has two children. Their marriage concluded in 2022, after which Rachel began a relationship with Brendyn Hatfield, her co-star from Dancing on Ice.

Despite the promising start, Rachel and professional skater Brendyn, 40, decided to part ways last month. Meanwhile, her former husband Alex is currently expecting a child with his new wife, art dealer Lily, 31.

Reflecting on her past, Rachel confessed that she initially struggled to process the breakup, often suppressing her emotions.

In a candid conversation on HELLO!’s Second Act podcast, Rachel revealed, “There are days when you feel strong and ready to take on the world, and others when all you want is to curl up under the duvet and escape.”

‘I went from being married and then went into another long relationship, and I don’t know if I actually fully grieved the loss of my marriage. I constantly felt like my nervous system was on fight or flight.’

Rachel Stevens has admitted she is still grieving the end of her marriage – three years after his split from property mogul husband Alex Bourne

The S Club Seven star, 47, was married to Alex – the father of her two children – for five years before they divorced into 2022 (pictured 2011) 

She continued: ‘For a long time, I put the smile on and turned up and became the person that I thought I should be and got very lost along the way.

‘And now after real sort of experience of divorce, being a parent, with heart break it’s only really suddenly I have to build those foundations. I [put a lid on my feelings] and just sort of numbed myself because the feelings were just too much.

‘When I feel anything that’s sort of very emotional I withdraw, I isolate – so I’m really learning to reach out and be gentle and nurturing with myself. I don’t have to be anything other than what I am.’

Despite Rachel being newly single, she hasn’t given up on love as she is still a ‘hopeless romantic’. 

She said: ‘I’ve always been a relationship girl. I’m such a romantic and I love love. I want that movie love. [I’m] a hopeless romantic.’

The singer went on to admit she’s looking forward to turning 50 in several years time, adding: ‘You should celebrate every year. I like the power of being wise and emotionally more mature.

‘[Going forward] I want to trust and believe in myself. But that’s work in progress; we’ve never arrived. You can just do your best every day.’

Former couple Rachel and Alex were childhood sweethearts and reconnected in the mid-2000s when Rachel was launching her solo career and Alex was still trying to make it as an actor in Los Angeles. 

She went on to date her Dancing on Ice co-star Brendyn Hatfield (pictured), who she split from last month and her ex-husband Alex is not set to welcome a baby with his new wife Lily, 31

She said: ‘I went from being married and then went into another long relationship, and I don’t know if I actually fully grieved the loss of my marriage. I constantly felt like my nervous system was on fight or flight’ 

They got engaged in June 2008 after 18 months of dating and tied the knot at Claridge’s in London the following year.

The pair walked down the aisle to S Club 7’s hit Never Had A Dream Come True and her bandmates – Bradley McIntosh, Hannah Spearritt, Jo O’Meara, Jon Lee, Paul Cattermole and Tina Barrett – were there to watch them say ‘I do’.

Rachel announced she had separated from her childhood sweetheart, Alex, in July 2022, just one month shy of their 13-year anniversary. 

Alex and new wife Lily then got engaged last summer on Hampstead Heath after meeting earlier that year.

Rachel and Alex’s two daughters, Amelie, 12, and Minnie, nine, were both in attendance at the wedding and were both bridesmaids.

Rachel found love again with Dancing On Ice skater Brendyn, going official in November 2023 after first being paired together on the ITV show. 

The pair have since gone their separate ways last month.