In the early seasons of Vanderpump Rules, Scheana Shay reckons with the affair she had with actor Eddie Cibrian in 2006. She has now revealed that in her final season with the show, she was dealing with the knowledge that her husband, Brock Davies, had an affair of his own. Shay said she felt fury and disgust, but she also wondered if this was karma for her past.

Scheana Shay had an affair with Eddie Cibrian

When Shay first moved to Los Angeles, she began working at a cigar bar. She met Cibrian while she was working.

“If you were to ask me when I was growing up what my exact type was, to a tee it was Eddie — tall, dark, and handsome, with dimples,” she wrote in her upcoming memoir My Good Side (per Entertainment Weekly). “The second we made eye contact, he smiled at me with those dimples, and I melted. How could I not? He’s undeniably a gorgeous human.”

At the time, Cibrian’s wife,The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ Brandi Glanville, was pregnant with their second child.

“Of course, I’ve been asked a zillion times how I didn’t realize he was married. Why would I have thought he was?” she wrote. “He never wore a wedding ring, so I assumed he was single.”

Shay said she never tried to look up Cibrian, and so could only trust what he was telling her.

Scheana Shay said Brock Davies’ affair initially felt like karma for her past

Shortly after news of Scandoval broke, Shay learned Davies was having an affair.

“It really felt like I got my karma,” Shay told Us Weekly. “Did I deserve for [Brock to cheat on me]? No, but I told myself that I did.”

She said she has decided not to judge herself so harshly, as she has grown a great deal since the affair.

“I have a voice, and I want to use it. I am extremely proud of the woman I’ve become,” she said, adding, “I am not that 21-year-old girl chasing boys around clubs anymore.”

Shay believes Cibrian deserves to bear more of the blame. 

“I have worn this scarlet letter for so long. I’m this ‘home-wrecking whore’ every day in the comments,” she said, adding, “He’s the one who lied. He is the one who cheated. He is the home-wrecker. I don’t want to say I was innocent, but … I was lied to by a 33-year-old man when I was 21, fresh out of college. I feel like people tend to forget that.”

She shared why she decided to forgive Brock Davies

Shay said she felt furious when she learned about Davies’ affair. Ultimately, though, she decided to stay with him. She said that her daughter played a big role in this decision.

“Had there been no kid or, honestly, had I found out when he did it … 100 percent, without a doubt, I would have left,” she said, adding, “I’ve always been a person who said, ‘If I’m ever cheated on, I would leave.’ My ex-husband [Mike Shay] had an emotional affair, which honestly could be worse than physical, but this was such new territory for me to navigate.”

While Shay said she doesn’t know she’ll be able to trust him fully again, they are working to get to a better position.

“We’ve put in the work in couples therapy. We have a very open line of communication,” she said. “I want to show people that if you truly love someone, a mistake from their past doesn’t have to define the future of your relationship.”