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As the title suggests, this installment sees the Count brought back to life in then-contemporary swinging London as Van Helsing’s granddaughter must take on black magic, horny teenagers, and one of Dracula’s descendants with the extremely subtle name of Johnny Alucard (get it?!). The fish-out-of-water aspects get old quickly but viewed now as a historical artifact with an undead culture clash, it’s a blast to watch. It helps that the funky Blaxploitation-inspired score is full of earworms. For the full picture, watch this alongside its direct sequel, 1973’s The Satanic Rites of Dracula, which features spies, bikers, sinister property developers, and an evil scientist trying to create a new plague to wipe out the planet. Bram Stoker would have been proud.
Deafula (1975)
Aside from having the best pun title of this list, Deafula is a unique piece of work in film history, not just that of Dracula adaptations. Peter Wechsberg, a member of the National Theater of the Deaf, directed the first-ever feature film made entirely in American Sign Language with this Dracula riff. He stars in the lead role as a theology student who fears that a vampire is committing a series of murders in his small town. Shot in black-and-white, it’s easy to see this set-up and think that Deafula is a comedy, but it’s actually a very serious drama with a high body count and a heavy theological slant.
It’s utterly sincere in its commitment to telling a story with and for the Deaf community (this is a world where being Deaf is the default), but some laughable effects and the addition of a misguided English dub, complete with a wonky Bela Lugosi impersonation, somewhat undercuts its intentions. Its thematic confusion could inspire many a thesis, given how unexpectedly Christian it ends up being.
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Zoltan: Hound of Dracula / Dracula’s Dog (1977)
Dracula has a lot of wolves at his command in the novel and can turn into one (although most adaptations prefer seeing him as a bat). Still, the concept of a vampiric Doberman is not one that immediately comes to mind for a Dracula adaptation. Step forward Zoltan: Hound of Dracula, also known as Dracula’s Dog. The Romanian Army accidentally opens a subterranean tomb, as you do, and unleashes the vampiric Pinscher Zoltan, who was turned into a bloodsucking canine by Dracula over 300 years prior.
Now the dog and his master-slash-goon must travel to America to find Dracula’s last remaining ancestor. More dogs become vampires, including a very adorable German Shepherd puppy, and the good boy doggies are, of course, the only good thing about this film. It’s too badly made to be scary but not knowing enough to be funny. You’d think a movie with a premise this daft would know when to lighten up.
Dracula 2000 (2000)
Four words: Gerard Butler as Dracula. We could probably leave it there, but Patrick Lussier’s film is oddly more interesting than even that synopsis would suggest. Produced by, uh, Bob Weinstein, the infamous mogul made the film because the title was good. No, really, the uncredited screenwriter Scott Derrickson confirmed that.
