A clinical psychologist has revealed how to identify a narcissist in your life – and how to get rid of them once and for all.

Ramani Durvasula, from Los Angeles, sat down with Hoda Kotb and Jenna Bush Hager on the Today show earlier this week.

The expert, 57, revealed that early red flags included making every conversation about them and having a ‘low threshold for frustration.’

She said that the easiest way to deal with narcissists was to set boundaries for yourself – rather than them – and write a list of all the disrespectful things they had done to remind yourself why you were cutting them off. 

Clinical psychologist Ramani Durvasula, from Los Angeles, has revealed how to identify a narcissist in your life – and how to get rid of them once and for all

The expert, 57, sat down with hosts Hoda Kotb and Jenna Bush Hager on the Today show earlier this week

Sitting down with the hosts, Ramani began by explaining what signs to keep an eye out for when going into a relationship once you are past ‘the charm, the charisma, the confidence.’

She said: ‘The stuff that might pop out is every conversation is about them. They will bring it back to them, they’ll often interrupt you, they have a very low threshold for frustration.’

Elaborating further, the author of the ‘transformative guide’ titled It’s Not You explained: ‘As soon as things start going wrong – even if it is a little thing like they’re not put to the front of the line in the restaurant or they don’t get the table they want – you’ll start seeing this kind of anger coming out.’

Ramani revealed that this would often be directed at people who ‘have less power’ in those situations such as bartenders or servers. 

She continued: ‘You’ll also see that they will become really prickly if you give them any feedback.

‘[They] snap and you think “where is the charming, charismatic person?”‘

The expert claimed that any form of relationship with a narcissist amounted to ‘indoctrination’ as they tried to ‘shift the blame.’

‘When they start behaving badly, that’s when it really throws people off. They say “this has got to be me.” It’s not you but that’s how these relationships last for a while,’ she said.

Read Related Also: Speaker Johnson: Decision on Biden impeachment articles coming 'very soon'

She revealed that early red flags included making every conversation about them and having a ‘low threshold for frustration’

Ramani asserted that people were not born narcissistic, but instead became that way as part of a ‘social developmental process.’

She said that there was a spectrum of narcissism with the most extreme having ‘rigid’ personalities that were ‘maladaptive.’

‘They lack self awareness. They lack the capacity to self-reflect – “how am I affecting other people” – because there is not a lot of empathy,’ Ramani added.

She then revealed the best way to deal with narcissists in your life was to set boundaries for yourself – rather than for them.

These included stepping away, disengaging and even viewing your conversation with them like it was a podcast.

Discussing how to cut a narcissist off once and for all, the clinical psychologist explained: ‘Not everyone can leave, but many people do.

‘When you do leave a narcissistic relationship, not everything is easy.

‘A lot of people will say “this person is trying to pull me back in.” We’re back to that love bombing, charming, charismatic and it’s hard to resist. 

‘Some people will feel naturally drawn back, regretting, wondering did I make a mistake? All of that justifying you did in that relationship is coming back.’

Giving tips on how to push through this stage, Ramani advised: ‘Please sit down and write down all of the disrespectful, terrible things that happened so you can see it written down and you think “this is why.”

‘Do it with a friend, do it with a therapist but write it down.’