DEAR ABBY: I’ve consistently donated quarterly to two prominent children’s cancer research charities for many years, sincerely supporting their mission. Yet, recently, I’ve been inundated with more frequent appeals for donations.
While one organization maintains its quarterly requests, the other has ramped up to monthly, weekly, and even multiple times a week mailings. Additionally, I’m receiving phone messages, texts, and emails, despite never providing them with any contact information beyond my mailing address.
Today, I was overwhelmed by seven pieces of mail, six of which were solicitations, and surprisingly, five were from groups I do not recognize. It seems my details might have been sold or shared with other nonprofits. This barrage makes me feel like my donations are funneled into generating more requests, so I’ve decided to cease donations to them and instead support local school programs.
Is there a way to get them to stop mailing me? I hope this message reaches them, prompting them to reconsider their approach before losing donors. — FULL MAILBOX IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR FULL MAILBOX: According to Give.org, it is common for businesses and charities to sell or share donors’ contact information. Your name could be included on lists associated with specific interest groups or products, which are then used by various charitable organizations.
You may be able to lessen the onslaught of appeals you receive by writing directly to the charities whose mail you don’t want and asking them to delete your name from the mailing lists they rent or exchange. (A Better Business Bureau standard requires that a charity offer contributors an opt-out opportunity in its appeals at least once a year.)
Enclose the mailing label or return card that came with your appeal when you contact the charity. Be sure to add the correct postage to their envelope on which you have written “delete my name” or “return to sender” because charities’ nonprofit mailing rates do not pay for returns.
For more information on this subject, visit Give.org.
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DEAR ABBY: My mom passed last year. I’m 50, and my brother is 52. He has never been good with money. He’s gullible and lets people take advantage of him. He will not let me help him.
Should I get a guardianship for him or let him fend for himself? We already have a rocky relationship. I worry that taking control of his finances will make it worse. However, I would feel guilty if he mismanaged his money, and I think Mom would want me to help him. What should I do? — MY BROTHER’S KEEPER
DEAR BROTHER’S KEEPER: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your mother. It’s unfortunate these questions weren’t settled before her passing. Because your brother needs someone to look out for him, and you are the only one who can fill this role with his best interests in mind, discuss this with an attorney. Of course, it will need to be explained to your brother. Don’t put off talking with him, even if the subject is uncomfortable for one or both of you.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.