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There’s no joy quite like being a grandparent.
For grandmother Candi, being a hands-on, loving grandma is her goal.
However, she’s learning it looks different depending on which of her children she’s supporting.
“There’s a difference when your daughter gives birth to your grandchild than when your daughter-in-law does,” she explains.
“It’s definitely not as needed”
Taking to TikTok, Candi shared her experience and reflections on becoming a grandmother to her son’s new baby.
When my daughter had all three of my granddaughters, I was present, more engaged, and actively helping out with the children at home,” she shared.
But with the most recent addition, her son’s first child, things have changed.
“I’m definitely not as needed,” she said.
“Yes I take dinners, yes I go and visit, you know help clean a little bit. But it is definitely a different feeling.”
She’s found herself needing to gently pull back, navigating her role with care and self-awareness.
“I have to sit back because I’m an advice giver when nobody wants my advice,” she self reflects.
“My daughter always let me just say what I want, pick up the baby and I have to be respectful of this mommy.”
She’s quick to add that her son and daughter-in-law are doing a “fabulous” job — this is simply a whole new dynamic for her to experience.
“I need my mom there”
Viewers were quick to praise Candi’s honesty and emotional intelligence.
“Your self awareness as a MIL is so appreciated!!” one person commented.
“You’re so respectful!” another added.
Some weighed in with their own perspectives.
“I love my MIL. But I’m the one postpartum. I need my mom there, not his. It’s different,” one woman shared.
Another agreed: “It’s her mom’s turn like you had your turn with your daughter.”
Candi ends her video with a humble ask.
“Any advice? I think I’m doing well. I get little videos everyday, blessed that we’re in the same town,” she said.
Even after becoming a grandmother, she’s still open to learning. That might just be what makes her such a great one.
