DEAR ABBY: I’ve been dating a man for eight months who is not only attractive but also a fantastic dancer, and I match his dancing skills. My issue arises because he draws the attention of many women on the dance floor. Some women boldly approach and dance nearby, hoping to catch his eye, though we typically ignore them. Most times, I disregard these women, but occasionally, their behavior annoys me and dampens our fun.

He acknowledges my feelings towards some of these situations and suggests I handle them in any manner I prefer. While he doesn’t engage with these women, and I’m confident in our love, I still seek your guidance. I’m amazed at the audacity of some women who overlook the fact that he’s clearly with someone. It’s worth noting that men don’t behave this way towards me. — BOTHERED IN THE WEST

DEAR BOTHERED: Your boyfriend is already doing his bit by disregarding the women’s advances. If you’re not prepared to confront these women directly with something like “Back off, Honey, he’s with me!” then it’s best to follow his example. Indeed, some women can be forward, tasteless, and seemingly desperate. While you can’t change their behavior, you have control over your response to the situation, which is out of your hands.

DEAR ABBY: I remarried several years after my first wife passed away. I thought they were different people, but they share one maddening trait. They refuse to use the phone! Of course they talk to the children, relatives and friends, but to no one who must be contacted for a business reason.

For example, my wife is unwilling to phone the vet, carpet cleaning service or insurance agency. All such matters are dumped on me. In addition, when I do call for her, she insists on standing next to me giving orders on what I should say or how or who to talk to. Please let me know how to get my wife to use the phone. — TIRED OF IT IN THE EAST

DEAR TIRED OF IT: Your wife may feel that you have more knowledge about these things than she does but would still like to get her 2 cents in during those business calls. I have also found that sometimes men “hear” things better from another man than they do from a woman. Because this vexes you, the next time one of those calls must be made, stand next to her and coach her through it if she needs it. The term for this is “teamwork.”

DEAR ABBY: I am a mid-30s woman with a moderately successful career. I’m well known and respected by my supervisors and co-workers. I try hard to maintain a level of respect, professionalism and integrity every day. However, there is one co-worker whom I cannot stand. Just the sight of her makes my blood boil. I don’t know why her existence drives me crazy. Any advice on how to deal with this without destroying my career? — DILIGENT WORKER IN N.Y.

DEAR DILIGENT: I wish you had mentioned how closely you must work with this co-worker. Keep in mind that the relationship you have with the people in that office is a professional one rather than social. You don’t have to like her. Interact with her as often as you must and keep your distance the rest of the time, and it shouldn’t have a negative impact on your career.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.