Financial expert and author Pattie Ehsaei knows firsthand the importance of financial independence.

Ehsaei tragically lost her mother when her parents’ abusive marriage ended in a murder-suicide.

Separately, she once found herself knee-deep in $30,000 of credit card debt while in her own toxic relationship.

At the root of these deeply personal scars, Ehsaei found a lack of education and empowerment around women’s finances. 

Now she has dedicated her life to empowering women and providing them with the financial education they need to avoid such a fate.

Ehsaei has established a successful TikTok channel offering bite-sized advice and has published a new book, Never Date A Broke Dude.

‘My goal really is to help women just be better versions of themselves, and especially be financially independent,’ Ehsaei told the Daily Mail. 

Here, Ehsaei gives her top three financial tips for women – and the red flags to avoid.  

Ehsaei learned the hard way that choosing the right partner is critical for financial stability

1. Get on a budget 

While this seems simple, it can be hard to put in to practice. But Ehsaei is adamant: ‘If you don’t have a plan, you’re going nowhere fast.’

Ehsaei suggests that women should consider setting up five separate bank accounts for managing their finances effectively. These accounts should be designated for different purposes such as needs, wants, emergency fund, savings, and investment.

‘50% of what you bring home every month should go into your needs and maximum 30% should go into your wants,’ she explained. 

‘10% should go into your savings, 5% into an emergency fund and 5% into your investment account.

‘When you have about three to six months’ worth of living expenses in your emergency fund, that money then goes into your investment account.’ 

This style of budgeting can create a psychological roadblock where it is difficult to see your hard-earned paycheck put away immediately.

To remove this, Ehsaei suggests automating the transactions so the money is already divvied up once you receive your paycheck. 

Being awake to the financial red flags of a partner can save women from a lifetime of misery, according to Ehsaei 

2. Invest – but be picky about where

According to Ehsaei, investing plays a crucial role in financial success. Surprisingly, 66% of all millionaires have never earned an annual income exceeding $100,000. Ehsaei emphasizes the significance of investing as a means to build wealth.

Her advice is to start young and be consistent with the goal of investing 10% of every paycheck.  

To start investing, Ehsaei advises opting for ETFs and index funds instead of complex individual stocks. ETFs, also known as exchange-traded funds, are investment funds that contain a mix of stocks or bonds within a single portfolio, mirroring the performance of a specific index like the S&P 500, Nasdaq, or Dow Jones.

‘You don’t buy Tesla, you don’t buy Google, you don’t buy Apple, you buy ETFs and index funds. You set it and you forget it.’

Ehsaei says too few people know that they can begin investing with as little as $100 a month. ‘If you don’t have that, get a side hustle!’ she said.

‘If you start investing $100 a year in your 20s, by the time you retire, you’re gonna have over $500,000. If you do $200 a month, you’ll have a million bucks. 

‘That is very motivating,’ she added. 

Ehsaei’s new book, Never Date a Break Dude, comes out on May 6 

3. Choose the right partner 

‘Marriage is a financial transaction, the most important one you will ever make,’ the expert says.

With that in mind, she wants women to be very sure that their chosen partner matches their ambition, drive, commitment and work ethic.

‘Make sure that he or she is pulling their own weight. 

‘They don’t have to match you dollar for dollar, but they do have to match you hustle for hustle.’ 

Ehsai breaks down the seven things you need to ask a partner before deciding to get married in her new book. 

These include discussing goals for the future and expectations around spending. 

‘You need to start with being financially independent, and then you need to start setting boundaries with your significant other as to how you’re going to spend your money,’ she explains. 

Ehsaei also wants women to be aware of the red flags that could mean their partner is not a financial match. 

Women need to be disciplined with their budget, Ehsaei insists 

Red flags to look out for 

1.  If they ask to borrow money 

A partner asking to borrow money suggests they are not financially stable.

‘The fact that they’re asking you means that they’ve already run through all their friends, their families… and no one’s giving them money anymore.’ 

2. They can’t hold down a job

‘We all know that person that is always trying to find a job and can’t get a job,’ Ehsaei said.

Be wary of a partner that simply complains about how hard it is to get a job and comes up with a host of excuses. 

The truth, according to Ehsaei, is that person just doesn’t want a job.

3. They don’t want you to earn your own money

If your partner doesn’t want you to earn your own money and insists on merging financial accounts ‘that tells you that they’re trying to control you through money,’ Ehsaei explained. 

It is crucial that women always earn their own money and keep their own bank accounts which only they control, she said. 

Women should have enough in a bank account to be able to leave a bad situation, Ehsaei added, otherwise they are stuck. 

‘My mother ultimately lost her life because she wasn’t financially independent and she couldn’t leave a bad situation. 

‘I don’t want that to happen to another woman ever.’

Never Date a Broke Dude: The Financial Freedom Playbook is available to buy here.