Michelle Williams reflects on her time shooting the film Blue Valentine, which took place 15 years ago. It was during this time that she received an Oscar nomination for her performance alongside co-star Ryan Gosling. Williams describes the experience as ‘horrible’ due to a unique circumstance – she actually lived with Gosling during filming.

The movie, directed by Derek Cianfrance, received critical acclaim for its raw and emotional portrayal of a young married couple, played by Williams and Gosling. The narrative of the film weaves through different moments in their relationship, capturing the highs and lows, and ultimately, the breakdown of their marriage.

Williams and Gosling’s performances were particularly lauded for their authenticity and rawness, resonating with audiences and critics alike. The deep immersion into their roles, including actually living together during filming, added a layer of intensity and closeness to their on-screen chemistry, making their portrayals even more compelling.

Williams, 44, who was just a year removed from losing her partner Heath Ledger when filming began in 2009, opened up on the unique experience living with Gosling during a recent appearance on Dax Shepard’s Armchair Expert podcast.

The actors both agreed that to fully explore the depths of their characters’ relationship, they should temporarily live together, in a purely professional setting.

However, Williams described the experience as ‘horrible,’ since it also marked a major shift in the couple’s dynamic.

The film goes back and forth from Dean and Cindy being happy and in love to them being quite the opposite, with Williams explaining there was a ‘break in filming’ between those two halves.

‘We shot the first part when they’re young and in love and everything’s going really great, then we took a two-week break and we lived together,’ Williams explained.

She added it was more like, ‘office hours, 9 to 5, baby,’ and they were not actually cohabitating, but they did this so they could ‘destroy’ the loving couple they had built before their filming break.

‘We did these improvisations during the day, honestly, to figure out ways to annoy each other. And to destroy this thing that we had made,’ she admitted.  

The actress continued that they originally weren’t going to take that break but added, ‘We were having such a hard time letting go of the thing that we loved.’

Director Cianfrance told them, ‘We gotta mess this up, and we need to burn it down,’ which lead to a bizarre ceremony.

‘And we did a ceremonial burned our wedding photo and then we learned how to annoy each other,’ Williams admitted.   

When Shepard admitted that would have been very difficult doing that with someone you have just met a few months earlier, Williams admitted, ‘I know, it was horrible.’ 

‘It was horrible I don’t want to give you reasons to hate me or come in obnoxious,’ she said, adding, ‘We were having such a good time the party has to be over so soon.’

Williams admitted she ‘really was,’ feeling the heartbreak in that second half of the shoot, adding, ‘[she] was younger then,’ and she couldn’t always leave those emotions on set.

Now at age 44, Williams said she is able to ‘close the door’ when filming stops.

‘A hard day at work for me now, I feel it and I go through it but I definitely know that I get to go home. I can really close the door on it,’ she explained.

‘When I was younger it would definitely seep under the door.’

While Williams didn’t reveal where she and Gosling lived together, scenes for the film were shot in both Brooklyn, New York and Honesdale, Pennsylvania. 

Blue Valentine was released in December 2010 and reportedly earned $16.6 million at the worldwide box office.

It first premiered at that year’s Sundance Film Festival before making a splash at the Cannes Film Festival and the Toronto International Film Festival.

It was controversially given an NC-17 rating seemingly due to one scene that depicts Gosling performing oral sex on Williams.

He famously slammed the ratings board as ‘sexist’ and the film’s rating was later downgraded to rated R.

Williams went on to earn a Best Actress Oscar nomination for her portrayal of Cindy in the film, though she ultimately lost to Natalie Portman for Black Swan. 

Both Gosling and Williams earned Golden Globe nods for their performances.