I Was Chrissy Teigen’s Surrogate—It Wasn’t as Easy as I Expected

For nearly one-fourth of my life, I have been pregnant.

Six pregnancies in eight consecutive years have made me a mother of two, as well as a gestational surrogate three times.

Every pregnancy has come with its own mix of happiness and difficulty, but surrogacy brings a different kind of pressure. Anxiety is almost unavoidable when you are carrying more than a baby—you are also carrying someone else’s hopes of becoming a parent.

I first started researching surrogacy soon after welcoming my daughter Aria in 2019.

At the time, I was 30 and living in San Diego, California. My grandmother initially encouraged me to consider egg donation, but that path did not appeal to me. I had experienced a smooth first pregnancy, however, and began searching for another way to support women and families who struggled to conceive.

Becoming a surrogate seemed mutually beneficial. I could provide financial support for my own family while helping another family realize its dream of welcoming a child.

The nerves surrounding my first surrogacy were even stronger the second time, in 2021. That was when I discovered that Chrissy Teigen and John Legend wanted me to help them have another child, less than a year after the heartbreaking loss of their son, Baby Jack, at 20 weeks of pregnancy.

Following their loss, Chrissy and John began looking for a gestational carrier. After reviewing my profile, they decided they wanted to meet me.

I was excited, nervous and hopeful when I met Chrissy and John. Although I felt starstruck by their fame as a Sports Illustrated model and Grammy-winning musician, I reminded myself to look beyond their public profiles. In that moment, they were simply two people trying to grow their family after enduring a very public tragedy.

Once we decided to continue, I felt certain I could give them something meaningful. The journey ultimately proved far more challenging—and humbling—than I had expected.

Chrissy, John and I were matched only a few months after I delivered my first surrogate baby. That pregnancy had involved carrying a baby girl for two fathers in Seattle, Washington, and the experience had gone remarkably smoothly.

At first, I assumed my uncomplicated pregnancy and delivery would make qualifying as a surrogate fairly simple. Once I began contacting agencies, though, I discovered that applicants must meet an extensive range of medical, financial and home-environment requirements.

A strong candidate generally needs to have carried a baby to term without serious complications, meet specific income guidelines and fall within an approved body mass index range. Agencies also assess the applicant’s family and living situation to ensure the surrounding people and home provide a safe, stable and supportive environment.

After spending considerable time researching the process online, I applied to a highly regarded surrogacy agency in California.

My application was approved relatively quickly, and I soon attended an in-person consultation. The agency reviewed my personal background, medical history and preferences regarding the intended parents. Finding the right match is deeply personal, and it depends on everyone involved feeling comfortable and secure with one another.

One thing that surprised me was how little age affected the process.

I began exploring surrogacy at 30, which placed me toward the older end of the usual range. I was 32 when I matched with Chrissy and John. Although pregnancy can become more complicated as someone gets older, age is less significant for gestational carriers because they are not using their own genetic material. I was surprised to learn that some agencies accept surrogates into their early 40s.

The agency confirmed my information by reviewing my medical records, inspecting my home and conducting background checks on both me and my fiancé at the time.

Once cleared, the agency shared my profile with intended parents looking for a gestational carrier. Higher-profile couples, like Chrissy and John, use third-party matching services that search for a specific surrogate across different agencies, and that’s how they found me.

After a medical screening confirmed that I’d be physically capable of carrying a pregnancy, I moved onto the legal portion of the process – the step that takes the longest.

Although each surrogacy contract is individualized, they generally address many of the same details. They specify the number of attempts for an embryo transfer and payment details, including insurance coverage, reimbursements for medical fees and stipends for maternity clothes and prenatal massages. Payments are generally paid out in monthly installments after a fetal heartbeat is confirmed.

Once the contracts were signed, I began taking in vitro fertilization medications and prepping my body for the embryo transfer.

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With Chrissy and John, I had my first embryo transfer in November 2021. Despite multiple positive pregnancy tests, my first ultrasound revealed that there was no baby growing in the gestational sac. Because the pregnancy was not progressing, I would have to miscarry.

Miscarriages are already horrible and traumatic on their own. Miscarrying someone else’s child – no matter who they are – is a whole other level of sadness and anxiety. It was a lot of pressure, and I was battling my own body, frustrated that it was not doing what it was supposed to do. I wanted so badly to give John and Chrissy a healthy baby and yet, for reasons out of my control, things weren’t going the way we had anticipated.

Getting my body ready to undergo a second embryo transfer was also a much longer process than I could ever have anticipated. I had to undergo approximately seven procedures – including hysteroscopies, polyp removals and scar tissue treatment – before I was finally cleared for another transfer.

I was worried John and Chrissy would find another surrogate who could deliver their baby without any hiccups. Why wouldn’t they? Knowing who they were, I figured they could essentially pick anybody.

But they were so patient with me: loving, caring and gentle. They never tried to rush me or make it feel like I was at fault. I felt supported and given the space I needed to process what had happened. It made everything that much easier.

Luckily, in October 2022, the second embryo transfer worked.

And there was more news to celebrate. Earlier that year, Chrissy also found out that she was pregnant.

The babies – the one Chrissy was carrying and the one I was carrying – would only be six months apart.

She and John had waited until she was three months along before they shared the news with me. It was incredibly considerate given everything we had already experienced.

Chrissy and I were only pregnant together for a short period of time, but I loved it. It was such a unique and special part of the journey to know we were both carrying babies who would grow up together.

Throughout my pregnancy, I commuted to doctor’s appointments in Los Angeles from my home in San Diego. Chrissy and John couldn’t always accompany me given their busy schedules, but I took videos after every ultrasound to make sure they felt as involved as possible.

Before the baby was born, I relocated to LA to be in closer proximity to their hospital and doctor. On June 19, 2023, I went into labor.

I initially wanted Chrissy to help deliver the baby, but some unexpected complications prevented that from happening. Still, she and John got to be in the room when I gave birth. I’ll never forget watching them meet Wren Alexander Stephens, who they named after me, for the first time.

For me, seeing my intended parents look into the eyes of their newborn is the most fulfilling part of surrogacy. It’s the reason I’ve gone through the journey three times. It’s what makes it all worth it.

A lot of people don’t understand that surrogacy is a commitment. It’s a lot of countless doctor’s appointments and IVF appointments, it’s embryo transfers and potential pregnancy loss, it’s recovery, and then more transfers – all while being a mom and a partner and working full time. Surrogacy is so much more than simply being pregnant for nine months, though this part isn’t insignificant. It can take years from the time you match with the intended parents and the time you deliver the baby. There is so much that happens before anyone ever sees a positive pregnancy test.

The journey with Chrissy and John took two years.

But it was worth every minute.

Chrissy and John always treated me as part of their family. Even though I’ve since moved to Texas and no longer live locally, I love being able to watch Wren grow and live his beautiful life through the updates and photos his parents send me. There’s something special in knowing that I got to play a small part in helping create the family and life he has today.

As told to Katherine Fung